i can't understand<br>
why does my brain do this<br>
i want to say so many things<br>
but at the same time im afraid to say them<br>
it pains me<br>
it does, and yet at the same time im unsure if im implanting these emotions into myself<br>
the thoughts come along, and suddenly i start feeling them<br>
as to whether its my subconscious bubbling to the surface, or me making all of it up<br>
i don't know<br>
like all the other times this has happened<br>
i wish i knew the answers to all of these questions<br>
but life doesnt exactly give them out like unfavourable halloween candy<br><br>

i strive to improve myself<br>
but now, I don't know which path to take<br>
and even if i knew, i dont know if I could do it<br>